What I don’t understand is why everyone is taking this latest development lying down, as if it were inevitable. People should be raising hell. Tumblr needs to know that it has crossed a line.
Write to @staff and tell them that they have made a decision that will if not bury them then greatly diminish the viability of their future, as they have shattered the trust that allowed users to be themselves online.
Don’t abandon the communities you have worked to create; fight to make sure they remain.
so tonight I’m at synagogue, listening to the Purim Night reading of the Book of Esther, like you do
and near the end of this chapter my brain presents me with the following:
nooooo ooooone plots like Haman calls the shots like Haman plans a genocide by casting lots like Haman
(It only works with the Hebrew pronunciation of Haman, which, like Gaston, is accented on the second syllable.)
By the time we get home my brain has added:
for there’s none so well-favored and kingly yes, we all can be certain of that he’s so rich that his pockets are jingly and he looks really sharp in a three-cornered hat
*face in hands*
Petition to sing this every year at Purim.
I shared this with my dad, and he added:
No one’s spruce as Haman, Nor abstruse as Haman; No one’s half as good tying a noose as Haman! He’ll use gallows in all of his decorating! No one else hangs as well as Haman!
niiiiice
i know several people who will definitely appreciate this.
this is beautiful
oh wait
When I was a lad I hatched four dozen plots Every morning, to raise myself high… And now that I’m grown I hatch five dozen plots So all those who oppose me shall die!
do you think the dc universe has a news site like the onion that’s just like…
“meddling parents still alive, preventing bruce wayne from adopting yet anther orphan”
“new study shows that 87% of all americans class superman as american citizen despite being born on a different planet, but only 49% avoided eye contact when asked about why martian manhunter doesn’t count”
“area woman thanking her lucky stars that batman and superman fell out on the same day she was due to go to boss’ niece’s bat mitzvah”
“arkham guard astonished by trip to iron heights, only now learning what locks are for”
“area man pretty sure he should be making more than $60k a year if his boss has 10 billion dollars to waste on robotic exosuit”
“breaking news: lex luthor sues superman for loss of earnings, claims that continually losing fights to him is negatively affecting his work ethic”
“Hub City mayor declares state of unemergency after two hours without a violent crime”
“grown man who dresses in halloween costume every night thinks clown his biggest problem”
“disappointed child realizes Booster Gold at birthday party the real one, not just a guy in a costume”
“drunk Aquaman rampages through ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ ride”
“new Teen Titan not attached to any Justice League member wonders why they’ve been issued a uniform with a red shirt”
“Earth totally not a tax haven, say Green Lantern Corps as they assign eighth lantern to same planet”
“’no one knows how to stop him’ says armed police officer as non-powered clown-themed supervillain begins 82nd massacre this year”
“bruce wayne’s children accused of domestic violence after bruce wayne shows up to work with a cast on his arm and leg”
“superman added to fbi’s most wanted list after crashing into a very important dam”
“superman caught entering bruce wayne’s penthouse half an hour after batman reportedly left- a forbidden romance or one night stands?”
“Nation shocked and worried as President Luthor goes twenty four hours without ranting about the Danger Posed by Aliens on Twitter”
“Metal detectors continue to impede Robot Man’s ability to prevent plane hijackings”
“Wonder Woman claims “Constant kinkshaming from the hostages” the reason she allowed supervillain to banish bus full of people into a limbo dimension”
“Fifth historian this month reduced to tears attempting to make sense of repeatedly rebooted planets past”
“Healthy baby boy born to parents with Ridiculously Evil Sounding Last Name almost certainly going to grow up to become a supervillain”
“Rampage prevents rampage in Metropolis, Riot continues to act as his name implies he would to be less confusing”
“Will Magnus insists creation of beautiful large breasted robot girl programmed to be in love with him ‘Totally not a sex thing’ to disbelieving crowd at his TED Talk”
“Justice League International now forced to work out of trailer home, considering rebranding as Justice League Jersey”
“Local man thinks Themyscira is discriminating against him and his plans to open a Hooters there”
“Sideways to press: “Stop saying I’m Spider-man”“
“Doom Patrol to consider rebranding after realizing they don’t patrol doom that often”
“Elasti-girl sues Disney for copyright infringement”
“Pizza delivery man struggling to deliver to Watchtower”
“Local man getting real sick and tired of his car getting thrown at supervillains”
“Another physicist cracks while struggling to explain Flash’s powers”
““I don’t kill” says local bat enthusiast who apparently does not know what repeated blunt force trauma to their skulls is actually doing to the muggers and supervillains he beats senseless”
“Shockwave forced to halt crime spree after legal injunction from Hasbro demanding he cease all acitvities under that name”
“Atheists “Deeply annoyed” by Ares the God of War’s continued insistence that he does, in fact, exist”
“Birthday clown unemployment crisis in Gotham continues to worsen”
“Roscoe Dillon invited to lead Central City Pride Parade following confusion over what kind of Top he is”
“J’onn Jones causes frustration at local karaoke bar once again by repeatedly saying “Yes” during singers attempt to perform “Life on Mars” by David Bowie”
“Do ghosts exist? Jim Craddock, The Spectre and the Haunted Tank weigh in on this divisive topic”
“Orphaned child somehow goes another year without swearing to spend rest of his life warring on all criminals, experts remain baffled how this possible”
A haunted doll mistaking a creepy android to be a bigger, stronger, haunted doll, and the creepy android mistaking the haunted doll as a smaller, sassier android.
Android: [gets hit with rain water and short circuits] Haunted Doll: H̷O̷L̴Y̷ ̶W̵A̷T̸E̷R̶ ̵W̴A̵T̴C̵H̴ ̶O̶U̷T̴
Haunted Doll, dying: N̶E̵E̸D̷ ̷S̸O̵U̵L̸S̷ Android: [opens the haunted doll’s back and replaces the batteries] Haunted Doll: A̶C̶C̷E̷P̸T̶A̷B̸L̵E̴ ̷S̴U̴B̸S̵T̸I̷T̷U̴T̵E̴
Android: [transfers their data into a better body] Haunted Doll: A̸ ̵F̴L̸A̷W̵L̷E̴S̵S̷ ̷B̶O̸D̶Y̵ ̷P̶O̵S̶S̵E̷S̶S̵I̷O̷N̴
I would love to see this movie or story. A creepy looking android that gained sentience and on the run decides to adopt this weird tiny abandoned android which is a haunted doll. They have some cute adventures where the android is all protective and caring to their new friend in their own way and the doll is trying to teach this giant doll how to use his ghost powers in that body and murdering people who pose a threat to them. Maybe complaining about how technologically advanced has changed the world so much and how they feel lost in it despite being here for so long. At best the android thinks the doll is talking about becoming obsolite, and at worst (but funnier) they think the doll is saying how they are literally lost and tells them they have gps so they can take them to where they want to go and the doll is just like this dumb new haunted doll…I gotta protect and nurture it before it dies from it’s naivette. Meanwhile an excorsist and some retrieval squad are tracking them down and they argue about what they’re going up against. Most of the retrieval squad don’t believe in the supernatural and thinks they found another defective android and the excorsist doesn’t understand technology that great so just assumes he’s dealing with two possessed items.
Exorcist: The power of Christ compels you Android: Error 666 Exorcist, crying: THE POWER OF CH
bc i’m tired of seeing christmas fic written about jewish characters! anyway here are some prompt ideas, goy inclusive even. anyone is free to use/rb!
It’s an hour until first night candle lighting. Person A and Person B reach for the last pack of candles at the store at the same time
The neighborhood loses power. Person A, who is not Jewish, sees that their neighbor Person B has a lot of candles going and stops in for some light. (Surprise! It’s Channukah!)
Somehow person A gets roped into cooking all the latkes for a Channukah party, which is fine, until Person B decides to tell them they’re making them wrong. OR person B starts eating too many OR Person B causes a huge mess
There are accusations of dreidel cheating—which means Person A and Person B have to play with someone else’s dreidel and an audience for bragging rights. Trash talking encouraged.
Person A, a goy, was invited to Person B’s Channukah party but Person B didn’t think they’d attend—now it’s Channukah and Person A clearly has no idea what’s going on and it’s kind of endearing how clueless they are
“Your latkes gave me food poisoning” “no it was the horrid sour cream you insisted on putting on my perfectly good latkes”
You accidentally caught your Christmas sweater on fire at my Channukah party while inspecting the channukiah. we put it out immediately and I’m trying not to laugh but oh no you think I’m laughing at you, not at the ridiculousness of the situation
This is a Bring Your Own Channukiah party what do you mean you didn’t bring a Channukiah/candles i guess we can share
“Channukah is about the miracle of the oil” “Channukah is about military victory” “Channukah is about eating fried foods, clearly”
you got sufganiyot jelly all over your shirt and now you need to borrow something of mine to wear this could get awkward
DarkestElemental616 