Not to sound like a euphoric redditor, but a massive and extremely influential part of American Christianity is just an apocalyptic death cult born out of a need to justify genocide and slavery
see the euphoric redditors wouldn’t bring up the genocide and slavery because they still want to justify those
I just found out that they have thousands – thousands! – of Torah scrolls, which they then donate to other Evangelicals for financial reasons and political leverage. (In one case, they donated a 16th-century scroll to Liberty University. It was completely unfurled and directly handled in an auditorium. By untrained students.) Almost two thousand of them are sitting in an explicitly Evangelical museum full of supercessionist bullshit, and the text of the largest display talks about how they were “saved” from burial or the genizah.
Saved.
From proper Jewish ritual handling.
By Evangelical Xians.
Who then donate these things to other Evangelicals who mishandle them.
For money.
I… I think I’m going to cry.
I was just about to post this! I even got a little shout-out in the article. 🙂
The notion of “build[ing] a Christian museum on the backs of Jewish items” is, as I’ve come to understand in my research of the history of Judaica collecting, goes back several centuries to the origins of the modern museum itself. But it is particularly disturbing to see how this classically-supersessionist and fossilizing language (“God gave those people [Jews] a job, and they did that job well,” Steven Green explains, referring to the “job” of preserving the Torah text in identical copies so that evangelical Christians could prove the Bible’s unerring nature) is intertwined with corporate capitalism and greedy tax evasion. If only there was something in all those Torah scrolls on the subject…
Not okay. Not even a little.
It gets even more disgusting when you realize that the reason why they’re desecrating our most holy artifacts is because they’ve figured out how to use them to perpetrate tax fraud. This is how the scam works:
A congregation owns a Sefer Torah. It is worth many thousands of dollars.
A rabbi examines the Sefer Torah and discovers that it contains one or more flaws which render it no longer kosher and it must be retired from use. However, because a damaged Sefer Torah likely contains individual panels that are still in good condition it can be dismantled and combined with other damaged sifrei in order to produce a new kosher scroll. Those panels make the entire scroll worth a couple of thousand dollars.
The congregation offers the damaged sefer up for sale with the expectation that the buyer will use it to produce a new Sefer Torah with the undamaged panels while properly laying to rest any panels that can no longer be used. Somehow one of these assholes buys it.
Said asshole donates it to one of these museums.
The museum then ‘appraises’ the scroll as if it were a kosher Sefer Torah worth tens of thousands of dollars. After all, who’s to say it isn’t, amirite?!
Said asshole deducts tens of thousands of dollars off of their taxes when they only paid one or two thousand dollars to buy the scroll.
So there you have it. Not only is the Sefer Torah deprived a respectful burial but a low-income congregation somewhere is deprived a Sefer Torah that they are able to afford. All so that some rich Christian asshole can scam the federal government out of a few thousand dollars.
Reading this raised my blood pressure.
I’m BEYOND furious.
I live in spitting distance of liberty university, that evil community. We only have one synagogue, and a chavurah. Also only one Islamic Center. In a SEA of evangelical churches who hate us. Another nearby town only has one synagogue as well. My heart feels like it’s being torn to shreds. Any of these small congregations would gladly have bought or raised money for that non kosher Sefer Torah LU mistreated.
Your church-going, God-worshipping sister adopted a small child and you’re excited to see them. But when you do, the child is a menace. They’re throwing things everywhere, setting furniture on fire with seemingly nothing, chanting in Latin to summon demons, but the weirdest thing is that your sister doesn’t seem to mind.
“You literally adopted the antichrist, Anne. What the fuck.”
“Yeah, I knew when I saw him at the orphanage. I figured if the kid had some decent fucking parenting that we could avoid the whole ‘Revelations’ shite. Nasty business, that.”
George, who’s name has been kindly changed from Damien, approaches his new mother with a huge spider in his hands. It promptly bursts into flames.
“Good job, love. Now go find the rest.” George’s face makes no expression, but his eyes shine when he recieves a pat on the head for his efforts.
As the months go by, George seems to settle down. He adjusts to school, friends, and the positive reinforcement Anne gives him. She encourages the good he does, even though the powers he uses aren’t “good”. When she gets calls from the school, it’s about a rambunctious boy that won’t sit still. Not a destroyer of the world and innocence.
It’s at Christmas dinner, that you let slip your amazement to your mother. How good Anne is for him and how he’s improved a lot. Still summoning hellhounds for games of fetch, though.
“Oh, he’ll forget how to do that when he falls in love the first time,” Your mother laughs, smiling wide.
“How do you know that,” you ask bewildered.
“Because, you did.”
okay so someone please write the story of the family of super-low-key holy warriors who have made it their mission to locate the antichrist in every generation (because when one gets spoiled they try AGAIN) and adopt them and love them into not being the antichrist anymore, thus perpetually delaying the apocalypse
delaying the apocalypse via good parenting I love this
I had a server tell me about how he was harassed into going to a church baptism ceremony by a not so close friend and to get them off his back he agreed
He decided some time before that of he was going to be forced to do this her might as well have fun with it right? So he goes to lush and buys one of the black bath bombs, and cuts it in half.
Now fast forward to the day of and he is wearing a small harness under his shirt that is keeping both haves of the bath bomb one either shoulder blade.
He volunteers to get baptised
They take him up put him in the white robe and then he waits for his turn. Now the friend who invited him had no clue what he is doing. They are pleasantly surprised to see him participating.
Honestly. A mistake on their part.
I only knew this guy for a max of 45 minutes and I could already tell this dude was a chaos entity.
So his turn comes up and they go to dunk him and the water immediately starts to foam and turn black and he starts screaming like a banchee jumps out the water and hisses at the priest
Everyone fucking lost it and her was banned from ever attending that church again.
So yeah all in all seems like a great thing to do for a hilarious story
going through my microsoft word archives is great fun because i always find the wildest shit in there and by “the wildest shit” i mean the time i tried to rewrite the entire bible from scratch at the age of eleven and a half
“And so Adam and Eve were cast out of the Garden of Eden, and Eve turned to Adam and said, ‘Nice going, loser.‘”
iconic
whilst you were listening to avril lavigne, i learned the way of the Lord