Fullmetal Alchemist AU where everything’s the same except Ed makes up stupid stories as to why he lost his arm and leg and they’re different every time someone asks.
ex: “I got attacked by a shark” “I stubbed my toe and decided I didn’t want it anymore” “I went through a steampunk phase” “Sheep are vicious when they’re hungry” “Squirrels”
“y-you have an automail arm and leg… you–you must have committed the ult-”
“did you know horses are omnivorous? you’d think they just eat grass and weeds but that’s what they want you to think”
Vor langer Zeit lebten alle vier Beeren zusammen in Harmonie. Doch dann erklärte uns die Feuerbeere den Krieg
und alles änderte sich. Nur der Avatar, Herr der vier Beeren, hätte sie
aufhalten können. Aber als die Welt ihn am meisten brauchte, verschwand
er. Einhundert Jahre vergingen und mein Bruder und ich entdeckten den
neuen Avatar, einen Luftbeerenbändiger namens Aang. Auch wenn er über enorme
Fähigkeiten verfügt, er muss noch eine Menge lernen, bevor er jemandem
helfen kann. Aber ich glaube daran, dass Aang diese Welt retten wird.
going through my microsoft word archives is great fun because i always find the wildest shit in there and by “the wildest shit” i mean the time i tried to rewrite the entire bible from scratch at the age of eleven and a half
“And so Adam and Eve were cast out of the Garden of Eden, and Eve turned to Adam and said, ‘Nice going, loser.‘”
iconic
whilst you were listening to avril lavigne, i learned the way of the Lord
So I was having a lovely conversation with @princeofsparrows about magic and magical items and he sent me several links to very useful lists and tables. Those can be used by any DM to improve the game and set some more fun/challenge into the game without adding enemies or limiting themselves to always better armors and weapons.
My players usually discuss for an hour about the best way to open every door with a single rune on it (even if the rune actually just means “toilets”). So if I give them an omniously glowing fork and they will turn around it for half of the evening…
We decided to share with you some links with awesome ideas for loot (or your NPC merchants). The links below include (but are not limited to):
Belt of Pants: This belt creates illusory pants on the wearer. The wearer can suppress the illusion at will.
Digging Spoon: This tiny spoon can dig through any substance with a forceful push.
Hungry coin: Cursed. Will attempt to eat other coins that it comes into contact with. Eats 100 coins an hour.
Crossbow of Whispers (Weapon, light crossbow): You can use an action to whisper a message and fire a bolt from this weapon at a target within range. If you hit, the target (and only the target) hears the message.
Scroll of Cure Blindness: Cures blindness when read.
101 Silly/Useless Magic Items – You need to read through 7 pages of the thread but there are some very nice ideas!
1001 most useless (dungeons and dragons) magical items – There are actually 21 of them on this list but they are really useless. It could be nice to drop something like that on the players so they can have some fun…
Now I will let @princeofsparrows to continue. He still has some things to add 🙂
The great thing about a lot of these items is that, despite their apparent uselessness, as with most things in D&D, an innovative player can find some use for it… and I feel it throws a bit of a wrench into the mix. Here are some other honorable mentions:
Rebloging for the screenshots.
The Duck of Undetectability exists in Discworld and is worn by a beggar.
THAT EXPLAINS A LOT ABOUT THE DUCK MAN
Also pretty sure that saddle at the end there is the same one used in a lot of fairy tales.
DarkestElemental616 